Motherhood: Deep Cuts & Bruises

(Back-dated post)

I was looking through my backend to do a clean-up and found this blog piece sitting in my drafts. Although it is all over, decided that i will publish it anyway so that you guys can refer to it if needed. Reading through it, i still feel the same heartbreak i felt at that point.

I am writing this post to share my thoughts and experience, if you feel offended at any point, just click the little x button at top and close your browser.

2 weeks ago, we received a call from my 3 year old’s preschool teacher and was informed that he had gotten hurt and that they might send him to the hospital. We immediately asked for a photo of our son. His teacher sent over the photo above 10 minutes after our phone call ended and we were horrified that the teacher did not immediately rush him to an A&E. Note that the picture taken was my son, already cleaned up and a piece of gauze casually stuck over the gaping hole in his head.

Understandably, I was very upset and after instructing the teacher to call a cab and send him directly to Gleneagles A&E where my husband and the relevant doctors (including his PD) will be waiting for him, I asked her how did he get hurt. Her reply angered me further and I felt it ridiculous, defensive and utterly unacceptable.

Me: What happened?

Teacher: He fell down by himself.

Me: ….How?

Teacher: I am not sure. He was running.

Me: What do you mean? Were you watching him?

Teacher: He was running, I tried to stop him.

Me: How did you try to stop him?

Teacher: I told him to stop.

Me: Verbally?

Teacher: Yes.

At this point, I was horribly angry and did not want to communicate further with the teacher as it is clear to me that she is not taking any responsibility and was being ridiculous with her replies. I refused to waste my time on arguing with her and went to my son instead.

The open wound was deep and cut right down to his bone.

This incident happened on the 1st of November (thursday) and he was admitted overnight, had surgery at 8pm and I chose to discharge him the next day in the noon.

Throughout this entire 3 days, my husband and I refrained from talking to the school or the staffs, teachers and representatives. Our reason for doing so is simply because we are emotional during that period and obviously a good percentage of that emotion is anger and frustration. We did not want to speak to the school with an emotional mindset as it will not be productive and instead, might make matters worse. So we informed the school that we will have a official sit down meeting at the school at 8am, 13th November. <– which is today.

Summary of the official meeting and outcome:

The principal, cluster director, area director and teacher were present and we first spoke about the accident and how it happened. Once that was clear, we shared how we felt and our views on the incident, what could have been done differently and what can be done to prevent such incidents from happening again. This meeting was civil and productive because we took time to cool-off. We went into the meeting with a calm mind and a cool head. Not as an angry parent, but one that is concerned and wanting to find a solution and truth to what happened.

Conclusion:

As a parent, I am upset. I am upset that my child got hurt and that he had to go through this. I am angry that his teacher’s replies were aloof and seemingly unprofessional. I am upset that the teacher did not know if he had to be sent to the A&E. However, I also understand and accept (after the meeting) that the teacher (she is new) panicked and was not prepared in this situation since she is new and have never encountered such an incident before. It was relieved that the school admitted their short-comings such as teachers not knowing how to communicate properly with parents and at times, though trained, do have lapses in certain areas. And I do understand that it is tough being a teacher, and having to handle 12 little kids in class.

I am glad that I did not let my anger in that moment control the outcome of this situation. I walked out of the school compound on a good note with the teacher and hopefully, gave her the encouragement to continue learning to be a pre-school educator. I wish that my son’s misfortune could help serve as a lesson on how she could have handled the situation better.

Practice graciousness, that is what someone wise said to me.

I did post this on our FB page when it happened last year, click HERE to go to the FB post.

signing off,

Calista

 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *